Q. What do you call a ghost’s mom and dad?
A. Transparents

Q. Why does Dracula consider himself a good artist?
A. Because he likes to draw blood

Q. How can you tell when a vampire has been in a bakery?
A. All the jelly has been sucked out of the jelly doughnuts.

Q. What’s a vampire’s favorite fast food?
A. A guy with very high blood pressure

Q. What do you call a Halloween boner?
A. Petrified wood

Q. Why don’t ghosts like rain on Halloween?
A. It dampens their spirits.

Q. What do you call a vampire that lives in a kitchen?
A. Count Spatula

Q. Why do mummies have no friends?
A. They’re too wrapped up in themselves!

Q. What do you call a tired skeleton on Halloween?
A. The Grim Sleeper

Q: What does a zombie get when it bites a ghost?
A: A mouth full of sheet!